One subtext of the eruption of sexual exploitation of women by men of power is the misconstrued dynamic of charisma. This common term is often used about someone with a hard to describe quality of appeal. We are drawn to charismatic individuals, captivated by them.
The Greek origin of the term is “divine favor,†implying that this is an unearned gift bestowed on them from … wherever. We have all been around them. Perhaps we’ve been up close to an idolized celebrity. Or perhaps, more simply, just in the presence of any larger than life personality, maybe your boss?
Charismatic individuals radiate an aura of confidence. They exude optimism and passion. And there is often a warm appeal that draws people toward them. It invites you to approach and lower your stranger guard. We can all bring to mind such charismatic individuals, whether famous or just those we have encountered. And when drawn into their orbit we inadvertently surrender some of ourselves to them.
But it doesn’t take much reflection to observe that not everyone with charismatic charm is worthy of our allegiance and trust. To be blunt, all manner of wretched creeps, fiends, sociopaths and serial murderers are often described as charismatic, usually with regret in the aftermath of becoming victim to their appeal.
The lesson is clear. Charisma is not synonymous with high character. Charm can be a presentation, an affectation by a manipulator. They can be textbook narcissists.
OR …
They might just be what they seem to be: an evolved human being worthy of our attention. These are those remarkable human beings who have come to their peak, to that state Abraham Maslow described as self-actualization. These are the charismatics who really are divinely favored. Their image really is what you hope it to be. It is their authentic self, an honorable character.
When drawing near to someone who then violates your trust and closes the space between you, who comes down to you and upon you, it reveals in that instant just which kind of charismatic they are … run and tell.
